Each year, around this time, we make a New Year’s resolution. We re-sign up for the gym. We recommit to improving a relationship.

We’re so hopeful that this time around, it’s going to stick. It’s that wonderful New Year’s bug.

If the only thing that has changed from the year before is our sincerity and earnest, we may want to get additional support to actually have a chance of making a difference this year.

You see, when you make a New Year’s resolution, you bring your whole self to this new vision, this new commitment. You bring your habits, your tendencies, your doubts, your emotions, as well as your discipline (or lack thereof). It’s like if I told you that I wanted my old Chevy to have better gas mileage without changing anything.

“You’ve got to be kidding me,” you’d say.

What if, however, I told you that I’d deep cleaned the whole combustion system, cleared out all the filters, and changed all the sparks? Then, that would make sense to you; I installed a transmission system, and now, you’ll believe me.

On Jan 4, 2018, I went to a fire burning ceremony at the local Unity Church. It’s a yearly ritual at the beginning the year to release everything unwanted from the year before, so we have a clean house for the New Year.

Here’s what you can do to clear out your internal filters and pipes:

1. Mark on your calendar 30 minutes of uninterrupted time. You can get your spouse or a friend to do it with you.
2. Grab a pen and a piece of paper for each person.
3. Set a timer for 10 minutes. When the timer’s up, you can extend it for a couple more minutes if that feels right to you.
4. Write down what you want to release:
   • People: your boss or your ex-boyfriend
   • Places: the old house that you moved out of
   • Events: Liz’s birthday party
   • Institutions: the government, the church, or the company
   • Guilt: for lying about what happened
   • Resentments: that you didn’t get the promotion
   • Regrets: that you didn’t ask for what you wanted
   • Blame: your mom for being so controlling
   • Disappointments: wishing you could’ve gone to Italy on vacation
5. Bless the items on your list and lovingly release them. They were a part of your year, regardless of how displeased or disgusted they made you feel. Ask God, the Divine, or the Universe to take them and make light from them.
6. Bonus: Burn the piece of paper.

What’s your New Year’s resolution?  Share with me below.

Best wishes for 2018!

What do you do when you’re totally exhausted?

Do you simply push yourself through the next task & the next one & the next one?

If you’re like me, you have more items on your to-do list than there are hours in the day. Most of the time, we simply move from one thing to another without taking any breaks at all, let alone any restful breaks to recharge.

And we rarely stop & check on how we feel.

We just do what’s expected of us.

Shortly after Hurricane Irma, I felt a lot more tired than usual. There were just more things to take care of.

By and large, I used every technique that I knew of to help maintain my energy level & positive attitude.

The other night, I was on the phone with a friend and I was quite tired. We had scheduled the call to plan an event & I wanted to honor my commitment.

When I told her that I was too tired to think clearly, she said plainly: “You can change that.”

She meant that I could use my mind, like a positive affirmation, to lift my exhaustion.

Normally, I would have done just that. However, at that moment, I was too tired to care. I just wanted to be. I didn’t want to do anything else.

Sometimes, we have no choice but to push ourselves to get the job done, like putting up all of the shutters even when you have no juice left. We do whatever it takes.

Other times, using an affirmation feels pushy, mean, and unkind to ourselves.

Those are the times that we need to simply respect our bodies. To be kind, caring, and gentle.

So, I told her that I wanted to honor that feeling of exhaustion. And we hung up.

A funny thing happened afterwards.

I simply walked very slowly inside the house, noticing how exhausted I was. I even leaned against the kitchen sink for a few minutes, feeling that sense of heaviness in my bones.

Then, I moved around some more, all while saying to myself: “I. AM. So. Exhausted.”

I didn’t fight it.
I didn’t manipulate it.
I didn’t try to change a thing.

I simply noticed it, accepted it, & felt it in my flesh & bone.

After a while, that sensation of total exhaustion dissipated.

Then, I sat down & leaned my head against the back of the chair. I placed one hand on my solar plexus & the other over the collarbone. And I closed my eyes.

That felt good. That gentle energy exercise helped me recharge.

What do you do when you are super tired? How often do you give yourself the space to feel it, to be it, & to allow it to move through by itself?

I’m a pretty level-headed person, generally calm and composed. However, I panicked this summer on a road trip after losing GPS signal.

I had just finished walking in the mountains, two hours away from the airport. My flight was in four hours. I needed to return the rental car.

It was a beautiful day. I gave myself plenty of time.

After I keyed in the destination & pressed the ‘Directions’ button, the app simply circled with the word ‘loading …’. After a while, it came back & said: ‘the server appears to be offline’.

I restarted my phone & tried again. Same message.
I hopped onto another navigation app. Same message.
I restarted the phone one more time & tried again. Same message.

Now, I started panicking … … I was so prepared, but I didn’t expect the GPS to stop working. I almost cried.

We all panic from time to time. Even the best, prepared & most composed of us will encounter something unexpected. And we panic.

It’s only human.

The thing is, when we panic, our physiology mandates that fight & flight response to take over. Blood rushes from our fore-brain to our limbs so we can run or fight.

Physical prowess takes over. Mental ability takes a back seat. After all, our ancestors didn’t think their way out of approaching tigers.

Except, today’s world is a lot more complicated. The disasters that we encounter require a lot clearer thinking than when things are going well.

We need more blood in our brain, not less.

A simple way to bring more blood to the fore-brain is to place one hand over your forehead. Breathe deeply. Relax your shoulders & elbows.

Doctors have discovered that there are points on the head that help bring more blood to internal organs & muscles. They’re called neurovascular points. The bumps on your forehead above the eyebrows are some of those points.

Hold that position for several minutes. You’ll find the blood coming back to your forehead. You’ll find yourself less panicky and calmer.

And then, you can figure a way out of the mess you find yourself in.

Now you know this simple yet powerful tool. And it’s not enough that you know it. You won’t remember it when you panic, unless you take time to train yourself and get into the habit of using it.

To train yourself, set aside five minutes each day for two weeks. Sit comfortably. Recall a situation that made you panic or feel upset. Place one hand over your forehead and hold. Remember to relax & breathe deeply.

Once you build this muscle memory in your brain, you’ll remember to use this tool when you need it!

What made you panic in the last 3 months? What’s your experience when you place your hand over your fore-head while recalling this situation? Share with me in the comment box below.